There is nothing either good or bad but
thinking makes it so.” Shakespeare
Make believe was a
game I loved as a child.
Unbridled
imagination led me believing and being
A Princess,
A Spy,
An Archaeologist,
A Mother,
A scientist
A Goddess Warrior.
How easy and
natural it seemed.
Think, Believe, and
so it is.
I still do that.
We all do .
The question is what are
we thinking?
We’re always
making a BELIEF from the thought we are believing
A Belief is simply
a thought we think over and over and over
A BELIEF is a
thought habit.
Practiced to the
point of laying down a super efficient neurological highway
This is great if
we are thinking thoughts like
“I always find a way.”
“I have enough
(fill-in the blank… time, money, love).”
“It’s easy for me
to know what I want.”
Not so good, if
it’s the garden variety default thinking of:
“It’s too
hard. I don’t have enough time. It costs too much.”
Which brings me to
the question…
What are you
believing?
What would you like
to believe?
“BUT,” you scream…
“How can I believe
something is good when the evidence I see is bad?”
Reasonable
question.
The point isn’t to
look at evidence and deny it. But… if you want a new Belief
You must have a new
thought and here’s how:
3 Steps to Finding
more empowering beliefs.
SEE IT / STATE
BELIEF
QUESTION IT
REFRAME IT
Lets use Nail
biting as an example.
SEE IT: See it FACTUALLY-
neither better nor worse than it is)
My nails are
bitten below the quick. I have bloody scabs on the edges.
(Note: subjective words like “disgusting” are omitted because that’s not factual; i.e., could not be proven in a court of law)
Statement: “I am a
nail biter. I can’t stop biting.”
QUESTION IT:
Do I bite my nails
EVERY SECOND I AM AWAKE? Are there times when I’m not biting my nails?
REFRAME IT: I sometimes bite my
nails. I have many more hours where I don’t bite my nails. (Look for the
evidence you want to see and state that.)
As you loosen up the old BELIEF
you create the possiblility of making
new beliefs.
The thing is you
can’t get from where you are to where you want
to be without a
BRIDGE
A bridge sounds
something like this.
“I bite my nails. I
have nails, There are many hours when I don’t bite my nails. I don’t bite when
Im sleeping or doing things I love. Its fun to do things I love. I like how
comfortable I feel doing things I love and not biting my nails. I believe if I
can easily not bite my nails in some situations I could learn and practice in
other situations. I believe I could be free of the habit of biting my nails. I
believe I could grow my nails. I believe I could be confident showing my nails.
I like feeling confident. I can practice feeling confident.”
Get the picture…
That’s the
self-help version of an upward spiraling rant. Working with a coach can
accelerate you progress and help you do some nifty processes that re-wire your
brain for NEW pathways, especially for habit patterns like nail biting.
Here’s the
truth. I decided I wanted to have a Monday
blog called : “Make Belief Monday” and I confess a tsunami of negative beliefs
showed up along with that flash of inspiration.
What ran through
my head?
“Good idea, but
you wont’ have enough to keep going.”
“Good Idea, but it
s a lot of work, do you think you can commit?
“Good idea, but will u have the discipline to do it?
At least my mind was asking questions.
This was progress from believing an unquestioned, all too familiar, belief of
THIS IS TOO HARD, I CAN”T DO THIS!
Making belief “ is simply about questioning a thought often
enough to create a new thought that is stronger than a previous
belief.
So here I am committing to helping you bust 1 negative Belief a
month. I will take you through the most
common ones I hear all the time and have used myself.
Beliefs like:
I’m not good enough
I’m not smart enough
I lack discipline
I don’t deserve it
I’m not ready.
Will one ever get to the place of perfect belief? I guess it depends on if you believe that.
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